Did I just made the worst decision ever?

I couldn't stop crying. This has been the longest fight we ever had. Three days and counting. I don't know what I should do anymore. I apologized but it wasn't sincere enough for him and worst still, I didn't even start the fight and yet I get the blame. For picking a fight, for my ego is too big for this relationship? Who's ego is too big? Seriously. Is it really coincident that you couldn't make it to come up to KL each time or is KL just not good enough for you? Whenever I brought this up, he says I'm being calculative, so I kept quiet to prevent it from going in to a fight.

If my ego is the killer for every relationship, then with you constantly bringing our past 'fights' up, you are not doing any better. I am constantly being accuse for not loving you or care for you. I don't know how I can show it to you god dammit!! I'm in KL and it makes this so fucking hard do you know that!!

I'm losing my temper again. I couldn't control my tears because its the same feeling before my failed suicidal act eight years ago. When you have all the blame on you when you knew clearly you didn't do any of those, it's a fuck up feeling.

You can't take care of me cz before the world even fall upon me, you already hurt me. Your door can be replace but let me tell you, words being said can't be replace or taken back. They cut sharper than blade or anything in this world. They can make someone feel like they are the happiest person in the world or it can make someone feel so low, even life is not worth living. I am absolutely outta my mind to actually think this is gonna work. I made myself believe it's gonna work n in the end, I got myself burnt.