Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Stress in Excitement

Now that I looked at my blog, I'm totally ashamed for I have abandoned it for a month or so. And here I am, coming back with news. If you haven't know yet, I'm actually leaving to New York in a week's time (six days to be exact). I am VERY excited actually. Here's why:

1. It's NEW YORK! Even hearing the name, my heart totally skipped a beat.
3.It will be a white X'mas n New Year!
4. Meeting Emo-boi
5. Last but not least, visiting MomFi.

This is deffos by far my most awesome holiday, but truth be told, I'm super stressed! So much going thru my mind right now. Like in one of my post, I'm getting all jumpy about everything. Whether it's necessary or not. Sigh. Sharing my #1 stress:

Not many people knew the fact that I have not seen MomFi for the past 10 years. So, YES! I think I have every fucking right to be stressed and nervous! Can you actually imagine what is running through my head right now? For sure that me and MomFi will seem like strangers, but I fear for the worst, what if her love for me has worn out thru out the years? People did told me things like "It wont, cz she's your mom, yada, yada, yada...." Through out me and MomFi's conversation, it did felt that way. All I can do is just keep telling myself to not have high hopes. At least when she disappoints me, I still have a reason; to visit Emo-boi.

Which brings my #2 stress:

Me and Emo-boi has been friends for ..... eerrr.... can't remember, nvm, it's not that long if your wondering, but not that short too. Point is, we have been seeing each other alongside with Nagen n Umar for almost everyday during our college days. And this is the first time seeing each other after a separation for about 4 months. So, here comes my stress n paranoia questions like, What if we're not that close anymore?! And worst after MomFi disappoints me, who do I talk to? I know I sound very silly for thinking all the negative thoughts. But who are you to tell? We all know time can cure all the sorrow, but time also tear people apart! OMG! As I'm typing this, I think my problems is bigger than I thought. HELP!!

Sigh... How I wish BGBK can come along with me for this holiday. At least for now, I know I can count on him. And even if he can't come along, he prolly will send me to the airport for I won't be seeing him more or less of three weeks. But unfortunately, he can't. Due to work, he has to go out of state. But he promise to come pick me up when I'm back! But this promise obviously is not valid under unforeseen circumstances. So, double sigh.

Here comes stress #3:
I actually bought my winter coat from Zara and I totally loving it!! It's Oh-so-stylish! And guess which devil came and put scary thoughts into my head? My dearly sis-in-law. : ) Well, she actually has a fair share experience with temperatures that hits negative. So, with one look on my coat, she said it's not gonna keep my warm. And that's after I bought it wtf. It's totally contradicting with what BGBK said. Maybe guys is strong enuf to withstand those temperature, and I'm deffos cold intolerant! So she is kind enough to loan me her's just in case when I'm freezing my ass off. Problem is, it's not as stylish compared to my Zara coat. Oh well, fashion and comfort, it's a tough choice!! I guess I will be able to make a decision when I'm freezing my ass off if it happens.

As for now, I should really slap myself twice and say stop worrying so much. Okay, maybe not the slapping part, but yeah, it should be lotsa fun! Before signing off, I wanna apologize in advance for, I don't know when is the next post coming. But one thing for sure, there will be massive update of New York once I'm back. Till then, lotsa love!