Monday, September 17, 2012

Faster, better, stronger.

You know they always said you'll improve after each experience? That's true. I remember the day I was told to move on, the day my relationship ended. I expected myself to cry and feel total agony that as if my world came crushing down. But I didn't and instead, I went on to work. Came home feeling devastated and called my SIL to release the stress and tension(best therapist). I waited the next day, I teared for everything that has ended but I didn't cry like a baby, although I thought I would.

Days went by that I shed tears here and there but never cried like a baby. I was worried I might break down somewhere in between. Somewhere, sometime inappropriate but I didn't. I wonder if that's normal but I was told it is. Maybe because I was still waiting for the explanation that he said he owes me. Maybe somehow that gave me hope that I could patch things back. I was dishearten that it didn't happen because well, fat hope of course. Still I was just extremely sad and disappointed, but no crying baby yet.

It was then that it struck me, I didn't cry because I've had enough of men like that. Men who couldn't pluck up the courage to end things properly. Who didn't have the balls to do it face to face. The day that he decided to text me on the breakup, was the day that I saw him as a lesser man. Sure, technology is created to make man's life easier but in a matter like this, I'd expect em to give some respect and do it face to face. Many a times I defended him and gave excuses to keep holding on, hoping everything would be better but then I learned that I didn't cry because deep down inside I knew he was well not worth it.

"Every men can go through good times with you,
 but the keepers are those who went through the tough times with you".

I felt that I  healed faster, got better and grew stronger after all this experiences. I believe a big Thank You is in order.

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